Part 069 · ~2 min read

Cannot sleep.

It’s past midnight, and I cannot sleep.

A girl I like is after a man I can’t stand, and I want her to pay for that. I am trying to make this man fall in love with me to piss that girl off. I am pretending I am interested in a man to piss him off and bring him back to earth.

I am looking for a place and still got no apartment to go and stay in a few weeks. I have a job that doesn’t allow me to plan anything, not even a holiday, and I am sure I will lose it in September because my boss is a man who is after me and who is hosting me.

I am a fucking Dike! I hate myself more and more… Why is all of this happening to me? Isn’t enough having suffered when I was young? Isn’t it enough to be a freak and like women rather than men? I don’t know what is happening, but I know this is not what I wanted.

I might disappear soon. Barcelona, Amsterdam, London and Timbuctu! Anywhere but here.

Goodnight to you. Mine will be the usual one full of nightmares…

Comments.

luigir 19 August 2009 at 05:28

Dear Simona,

Just try to live your life with less drama. I know it sounds terrible, but I think you can have an ordinary life if you want. You were alone and looking for someone to share your life with. Now you found her, and you are pissed off because she wants to sleep with someone else. Come on! Get real! You are a bit too much on people. She likes you, it is clear from what you say but, let her breath! If she has bisexual needs, it seems obvious that she would go for men and women. If you feel this is not acceptable for you, leave her and do not humiliate yourself by playing tricks on the two guys… I find it a bit immature… Goodnight, girl; I cannot sleep either these days, but it is not a matter of nightmares. Kisses!